Resource performance evaluation

- Come in, come in... take a seat! the boss said visibly bored.
I entered the room and sat on the chair accross his desk. He let me wait for a minute or so checking his emails annoyed and then said:
- So you know why you're here right? It's the end of the year and I need to evaluate your performace, what you brought for the Corporation during these twelve months and repay you according to your work. So Seb I have to say you were pretty ok, you did your work, not exceeding the targets though and you could show some more gratitude to the Corporation...

I had nothing to say, I barely coped with the volume of work he threw my way, when to take the time to volunteer for some projects and go the extra mile. And I was always so tired and demotivated but of course that was the normal condition for a resource in the Corporation.

- But our great leaders are kind and rewarding the boss said, just yesterday the Corporation Board, our more beloved collegues who take care of us and guide us towards success encouraged us to give a little to the working man, to the humble resource who makes everything work.

He paused again awaiting gratitude but I was as blank as a statue so visibly angry he continued.
- Altough I think they are far too kind when they need to put some more burden on the resources I will give you a 0.4% raise this year as well as a week salary as premium. Spend it wisely.

- Is that all? I asked really bored trying to put a fake cynical smile.
- No no, the boss said, I also want to wish you Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas resources, take a good rest while you can because the new year will be tougher!

Do the job resource!

That's how she put it, plain and forward. I stopped a moment to take a better picture of our new big boss of the local office. She was 35 maybe 40 at least, blonde, slim and quite attractive. The kind of woman who could use all her assets to quickly climb on the corporate ladder. She was the kind of boss who woked depending on one of the moods she was in that day: normal, bad and worse.

So I was there on the interim job dealing with tasks that were by no means in my job role until they got to hire a poor bastard to work him all day.

- Don't worry she said, I'll make sure you only get the critical tasks, I know you're temporary and still a bit busy with your job responsabilities.

By a bit busy she meant I was already doing overtime and working my butt off. And I suspected these limited very critical tasks would add up quickly. I expressed my concerns politey and saw the sexy blonde making a displeased figure, clearly she was there to pass the orders not to talk the through.
Very annoyed she finally said to contact her if I get overwhelmed and let me know the "audience" is over. The blonde princess shouldn't be disturbed any longer.

I left and met Dave for lunch, he was almost sleeping on the table. Another long tiring weekend with the kids, he barely slept a couple of hours. He saw me and asked if I had a couple of bucks until the paycheck. I gave him a few, I was pretty broke as well.

- Hurry up resource I said with a bitter smile while he starting eating, work is waiting!
- I know he said, I have been doing it for the past 10 years and I still have 30 years to do the job going forward...

Overtime work for the resources

For the last two months I stayed at the office overtime almost daily. Lots of work, lots of expectations. The Corporation is going through critical moments they said. We all know what that meant. Fiscal year was coming to an end and the profits weren't good enough. Not good enough to satisfy the shareholders, ulta-rich jokers rotting in their luxury yahts, on exotic beaches and premium cars. And we were busting our butts to bring them those extra few dollars per stock to keep them happy.

- How are you Seb? said Dave with a tired look. How was the week? Happy Friday.

Same old joke, resources waiting for a little break in the weekend. Saw it every week, each Friday they fol themselves, acting all happy, wishing desperately to believe they are happy only to get a 48 hours break from their chains, only to return on Monday morning looking like zombies, ready to get worked hard for another week. Some younger folks were genuinely happy, too young and stupid to realize what they're in.

- Surving Dave, just surving I said with a low voice sipping my coffee.
- What are you planning for the weekend?
- Nothing, recovering on sleep. Not in the mood for much else lately.
- Eh me neither... They're workig us like animals.
- Don't take it personally I said, they got to turn a profit not don't they?

Paulie was approaching us, he worked in a nearby bank. Quit the Corporation a couple of years ago and moved from place to place for a few dollars more. He got it bad in a couple of places, worked till he dropped, yelled at, made resposible for all trouble. Now he made it a bank paying one of the highest sallaries in the country for a resource but he was looking unhappier and older as ever. They worked him really good for those dollars. He was always complaining about money though, me and Dave were always wondering what he did with his pay.

Weekend work for the resource

- You know Seb, you gotta login this Saturday from home. There's an incredibly busy week and the management would need to know daily data.
I said nothing with a puzzled face. The boss continued:
- It's not just you, your colleagues from our rural support centers in Asia will work too. They have even agreed to work during the night but of course we will not ask you that, a normal 9 hours shift would suffice.
I was getting annoyed, these so-called reports were nothing fancy, just some excels with a couple of figures and graphs to keep management happy. But what can a resource do?
- Of course we can't pay you overtime or extra but I can assure you we will consider this at your next yearly evaluation.
Oh, I thought, probably I will get a few slaps less if I keep up the good work. A raise was a joke, a bonus even less. You always heared how bad it goes for the Corporation and how we all have to make sacrifice for the greater good.
- However for being such a good sport you can come on Monday a little later at the office, added the boss smiling. Not too late though, we have lots of work to do!

Sexy red , come to bed!

Another boring day at the office, get there early, start the computer and tons of emails begin poring in like crazy. I am staring blank into the screen waiting for the mail application to finish and since it is so slow I drag myself to the cafeteria for a coffee. It's early, most of the desks are still empty with just a handful of employees at their workstations.

I enter the cafeteria in zombie-mode, auto pilot, still sleeping and get a coffee. I step back to the desk and start going through the emails and then I freeze... there is one from her, Sexy Redhead sent me an email. I quickly open it and understand, her team send tens of such email to different websites admins and I just happened to be in the admin list of a site where she spotted an error. Generally I delete these emails without thinking and don't care but this, this was the chance I have been waiting for. So I said to myself I need to be a good resource and pay more attention to these problems.

I stood up and looked towards her desk, she was there working. I walked slowly to her office all this time thinking what I'm gonna say to her.

- Sexy Red, come to bed! ... no , I just thought that, of course I didn't say it out loud.
- Hi, I'm Seb ... you just sent me an email about on error on website license plate R112353...

She turned and looked at me with her big blue eyes and I froze. It was like time stopped and I couldn't stop staring in her eyes. She looked gorgeus and I was hypnotized, my mind went crazy and I started imagining how would it be to be with her. After what seems like hours to me she said:

- Hi, yes, it's common, we send tens of these emails to make the owners aware.

I regained my posture and replied:
- Thanks for letting me know however I'm not the admin there anymore and I get tons of emails on this subject, can you help me delete my name from the records?
I needed to prolongue this talk, to get some follow-up somehow.

She looked confused, I guess everyone just deleted those emails and none came to her to actually care about that. She promised she will look for a contact who can help me. I thanked her and let her know I will reach out for the name. She returned to work and I left back to the office where I had already an angry customer demanding a task urgently. But I didn't care that much, for the first time in many many years I felt very happy in a workday morning. Sexy Red, come to bed ....

The clock didn't ring to his head

From time to time we got the visit of Paulie for lunch, he was an old colleague who left the Corporation a while ago in search of more money. He ended up in a bank, with a better salary indeed but without any colleagues close to his age, vicious working envirnonment and lots of work to do. Desperate to socialize at least a little he always texted or phone me and Dave (yes, both of us) to meet him for lunch or coffee. Usually we didn't mind as he was a funny guy and a tormented resource like us.


One time at lunch he told us a funny story:
- Guys, there is a family in my block who had a kid, my age, my generation. That guy never worked a day in his life so far, his parents gave him money as a child, they were retired with fake illness pension and managed to declare him handicapped so he was granted a state-paid pension as well. For years and years while I worked heavy whipped in the Corporation he was making more money from his state pension than me.
- Yeah... Dave said, this wasn't exactly a rare case in the corrupted society in which we live.
- And listen to that, Paulie continued, his mom likes to brag in the neighbourhood on how they fooled the state. My kid, she says with pride, never had a clock ringing to his head all his life...
I started laughing while Dave had a grin and said:
- Yeah, smart woman...not like us, resources... we are stuck working, can't get out.
- Ah, Paulie resumed, that reminds me of another story, my grandpa had a young dog which he used to keep tied in a chain. At first he was restless, trying to get out. When they let him out occasionally they had to wait until he was starving and he had to come to then and eat while they tied him back.
- Like us... Dave mumbled.
- And after a while he got used to the chain, no more escaping and having to be tricked back to the chain Paulie laughed, just like us.

Work hard resource!

- I want all these tasks ready this week and I want a daily status ok? yelled the customer through the phone. He had a strong French accent so I was trying my best to understand his words. Although I managed to understood those I had no idea how to accomplish more than half of it. Not to mention the huge workload, enough to keep two resources occupied full-time.

Dave was standing impatiently behaind me waiting for the phonecall to end, which it did in a caouple of minutes after the customer yelled some more and threatened he will escalate if the resolutions are not ready by end of the week. I closed the phonecall and tried to relax.

- When should we go to luch today? Dave asked. I have a meeting in less than an hour and I can't wait too much.
- Don't know I said reluctantly, I have to call this guy as the customer asked. He needs to send me some figures so I can start building a report and...
- Man, I see you for the last couple of weeks and you look exhausted, this new project is killing you. I remember the last month when I had one of those, I couldn't even get a good night's sleep.
- Me neither...Life ain't gonna be good to a frickin' resource...Don't know how much Ally can take with me being that down really....
- Have you spoken to Dale recently?
- Yeah, he advised to ease down with the stress, only a job he said... that's how he got an ulcer. However he seems to have resigned, tries to be at rest with always being a resource until resigning at a very old age. I don't want to do that, I will keep fighting to quit this frickin' rat race! Go to lunch, meet you downstairs if I manage to finish on time.

Dave said nothing, he just smiled and left. And I returned to the computer and started dialing. Long day ahead, I am sure I need to do overtime today too.

Monday morning resources

Moday morning, the most horrible time of the week. Everywhere you look in the Coporation offices there is the same picture, tired looking resources staring with a blank expression in their screens, touching the keyboards mechanically like robots, void of life.

Dave was in call, headphones one he silently listened the instructions of his manager. She was yelling or something as I could hear her through Dave's headphones. From time to time he nodded and said yes, yes i will do, yes i will check, yes i will resolve...

I waited for him to end his call while reading emails and responding to them, the project where I am assigned is a mess and there is an endless confusion to what needs to be done and how. Angry communications about asking plans, presentations and meetings invites were flying around.

Finally Dave ended his call and approached my desk with a pale face:
- C'mon Seb, let's get a coffee...

While sipping our drinks in the cafeteria I told him about the vacation plans, wondering if I can get the approval to leave for the two weeks while I was involved in that project and start a training while a return for a third week.

- It's horror Dave said, you have no time for yourself. Weekend was full of work, my kid was sick again and I had to run through the doctors, didn't get much sleep and now I am coming Monday morning to get kicked in the behaind by the manager. So frickin' sick of it.

While he spoke Jo Ann rushed into the cafeteria, she was a team supervisior and rumors had it she will become the next manager. Crazy woman with extra high energy level and low emotional stability to compensate she shouted jokingly to me and Dan:

- Get back to work guys, the Corporation is counting on you. She quickly left with a coffee in hand.

Dave sighed and said:

- Won't be long till she will be manager and she will be bustin' our balls and kickin our asses, and I bet she would love to do it anyway.

I couldn't disagree, especially of all the rumours on how she liked it going around.

Get rich resource!

I was drinking a beer with Dave one evening in a small pub in our neighbourhood, bad place, big prices but still the best offer we had. Like always he started complaining:

- Seb, I keep thinkining on business ideas to get free, I had a horrible week at work. Some bug product launch and they kept us overtime working like dogs for the Corporation.

Of course that meant no paid overtime or anything, just volunteer work. He looked exhausted while sipping his beer, long face, pale and dark under the eyes. I replied:

- Tell me about it, still one week to go until the freakin paycheck and I'm already broke ...
- At least you saved some money..
- I always do that, it's the only way to break free from this rat race in the Corporation. I save some money every paycheck and struggle to invest it wisely only to get broke at the end of each month counting the days until the next paycheck.
- Look at us, we can barely make ends meet. And we barely afford a freakin vacation a year.... We have got to do something, start a business, get busy...
- Not sure I got the energy to try again mate, I said taking a sip from the beer, I get drained at work each day and when I get home I feel numb like a zombie.
- Me too, Dave said, me too... But I doubt your method to save and invest will ever work, we're too low in the orgchart to save from our meager salaries...
- Yes, and that's why you try to earn more by working more and giving away more free time ... It's a freakin vicious circle, a rat race. And the cheese is stinkier each passing month as we're getting older.

Dave said nothing and raised his hand signalling the waiter to bring another two beers....

Resource reduction

- Have you heard they have announced a new wave of firing (at) people? Dave said with a concerned look. More than ten thousands this time, ugly ... How is a resource supposed to work with a gun to its head and a clock ticking on his desk?
I said nothing for a while, I have heard this news many time, they usually let go people every year trying to cut costs. The way of the Corporation.

- What do I do if I get a kick in the arse? continued Dave, what can I do? Where to go?
- Bad thing is we've become bonded to the Corporation as slaves to a cotton plantation. Cut our chains we will back to get some more whipping 'cuz we can't do anything else.

Gabe was approaching so Dave became quiet, he knew Gabe had the habit of praising the Corporation and tell us how us ungrateful bastards do not deserve these wonderful well-paid jobs we had.
- Hi guys, he said, you know what? An ungrateful bastard in my team just quit today. He said he was sick of his work, going nowhere with that so he left to his hometown to relax and try to open a business there. Damn fool! He thinks he can make it on his own...
- Well you have to admit that's courageous I said.
- This is madness! Gabe said.
- This is the Corporation! I replied sarcastically.
Dave left in a hurry, he had some paperwork to prepare before his next meeting.

Resource evaluation

- Step right in Seb said the big manager with a grin on her face, how are you?

- Good, good, thank you!

- Why I assume you're used to this by now, I tell you how you ranked through the year, give you an evaluation sheet and set some big challenging goals for next year.

She handed me a paper with the grading, nothing small, nothing big, all average rankings for a standard resource. I read it quickly then put it down.

- Any questions? she asked.

- No

- Well you certainly reached the standards this year but with no effort of going further. So I can't give you any big raise or anything, not to mention a promotion...

"Like you ever give big raises or promotions I thought"

- However I do feel you receive a small incentive there, maybe a couple of extra bucks for the Holiday, buy something nice for the kids. Do you have kids?

- No...

- Well you should, there is a good reason to strive to suceed when working for your kids. That's why you never go above average, there is no enough motivation to give it all to the Corporation so you can receive more for your kids. That's really sad.

I sat there looking bored while she continued.

- I guess you don't really need the extra bucks but I want to encourage you a bit anyway so here, sign here for the raise.

I took a short look, it was a insignifiant raise to a small salary, we always joked among us resources that all raises are enough to get an extra pizza and coke.

I signed, thanked her and was about to leave.

Before I closed the door I could hear her saying:

- And put more work and effort next year, we're all fighting on the same front for the success of  the Corporation.

I needed a beer. Or two.